Mania III

God dealt me some shitty cards I fight the urge to kill myself everyday I hope that my resistance is worth it someday I can’t keep it up much longer if this is all that’s real but a psych ward is more of a vacation than it is a solution I don’t think you can save me I’m so miserable and no one can save me life is meaningless death is inevitable that’s the only thing I look forward to I feel indifferent towards everything so numb from things I can never un-experience I don’t care enough to raise my voice or to be assertive I feel myself slipping into a miasma of dissociation desperately trying to turn off my human switch and to disappear into the shadows with blood dripping from my fangs for I am the life that sucks from other lives

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