Standing by for fun…

Good morning to my misunderstood fallen angels! It’s been a while since I last posted something other than poetry, random reviews, and reblogs. For that, I humbly repent. So let’s get to it, shall we? After my first heartbreak, I’m not really in a rush to get my heart broken again. So I sit idly by as all my friends are all in relationships. But looking back, the fact that I even have friends now is quite an accomplishment on my behalf. And also another fact that I went from dealing with hardcore issues to mere high school shit is a blessing in disguise. Yeah, I may be single and lonely but I’m focusing on myself. I’m getting my driver’s license this Thursday and I started my second semester in college today. Apart from those goals reached, I also have a job now as a Suicide Warmline Operator. It’s just I’m so proud of myself. And I deserve it because I have been through so much. Besides, all my past relationships were unhealthy and affected me severely. And I’m saving up for a car. So I’m not gonna bother wasting money on dates where they just end badly anyway. Money that would better suit me in the long run if I just save it. I am at my best at this point in my life and when I fall in love, I fall hard. But at the end of it all, I have no regrets whatsoever. Hardship is the only way to strengthen the soul, I always say. I’ve survived worse. I’m keeping myself busy now that my Summer is over. I don’t see it as running away from my problems or repressing my feelings. I see it more as staying proactive, acknowledging my past and how it affects me to this day, and trying to move forward with my life. God takes someone out of your life to make room for someone better. That’s what I always tell myself. And a life without goals or purpose is a life not worth living. That’s why I keep it moving. I also realize that although not even my friends can understand me, no one will ever fully understand ever. To expect people to fully fathom my existence would be foolish. That’s too much expectations on anyone. And to be honest, I don’t want people, even the closest people to me, to figure out my mystery because anyone can betray me. I am only in complete control over myself. I am okay with that. So with that paranoia-infected note, I hope you all have a wonderful day! Over and out.

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Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

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Ascend to my rapture

Submission to the flames would be effortless,
Merely losing control to let the devil inside your vessel,
Demonic possession adolescence is a window of opportunity,
Seek refuge under my body to change it up a bit,
Domination of the selfishly wicked is quite a proud feat,
Ascend to my rapture feel my penetration rupture your skin,
Beg on your knees to consume my nonexistent children,
Scream in agony inside my wool pillow,
Sexual frustration so sick of the same damned positions,
Bow down with your back to me so I can sneak in nonchalantly,
Sense my rage morph into exhilarating sodomy,
While you endure my eager girth and stamina,
Just to watch you squeal and hear you moan beneath my wrath,
As my pink staff pops open the red sea allowing salvation to seep through,
It must feel real good to convince spontaneous rendezvous,
Plural and singular forms are spelled the same,
This loneliness is driving me mad that means two things,
For I was alone when the silver wire tied us together,
Now I must meditate each day to unplug the cord and guard the emerald chakra,
Rise towards the orient once rock bottom becomes the norm,
Leaving behind the obsidian ooze that wasn’t mine to begin with

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Anti-Negligent Masochism

It’s funny how hurt people tend to hurt people,
Some pain may not materialize in the physical world,
Mentality and the spiritual realm are one in the same,
Antagonize beliefs that not all kinds of perturbations are bad,
For I can no longer recall the benevolent moments we had,

It’s funny how the human brain tends to worship chaos,
While leaving the purity to rust within the walls,
Altruism and chivalry died along with your heart,
Narcissism is contagious seeking help anonymously,
For I can no longer sympathize with anyone but myself,

It’s funny how most people fear their inevitable demise,
But they have no problem making murder immortal,
The golden rule is child’s play so it not longer applies,
He told me the trees are dead and at first I believed him,
I prayed to God the trees wouldn’t die until I did,

It’s funny how love is glorified by many but unknown by most,
Did I do something wrong cus I must have turned off your switch,
Hope that gravity forgets what to do when I fall again,
Heartbreak is where villains are born to rain on parades,
This world is lucky for I make a better ally than an enemy,

It’s funny how the best of us become the worst of someone else,
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure they say,
No regrets in a world that’s doomed to end in fire or ice,
Castrate me just to not be tempted to try again,
Boredom often leads me to revisit past mistakes

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Watch “Empath Daily Meditation” on YouTube

Start your day right. For anyone who wakes up in the morning with racing thoughts and worries like I do, I recommend that you meditate to this audio recording. If it can work for me, it can work for you too. Have a wonderful day, my fallen angels! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

The Legend of Korra: A random review

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The Legend of Korra is an animated American television series set in the Avatar universe as a sequel series to Avatar: The Last Airbender. The premiere episode aired on Nickelodeon on April 14, 2012. The series ran for fifty-two episodes, completing its run on December 19, 2014.

Both series take place in an alternate world where humans have control over one of the four elements: fire, water, earth, and wind. The world is split between four nations that each live by the respective elements. The original series made it clear that each nation did not get along. The avatar of each generation has the ability to learn to manipulate all four elements and their sole destiny is to save their world from calamitous forces. However, the sequel series based on Avatar Korra, the people all live in sync regardless of their innate abilities. But it doesn’t stop the writers from fabricating new villains and other threats to the protagonists’ cause.

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This series starts seventy years after the end of the Avatar: The Last Airbender story arc with brand new characters and settings. The protagonist of the new series, Korra, the Avatar after Aang, is a hot-headed and rebellious young woman from the Southern Water Tribe who is “ready to take on the world”. The series follows Korra as she faces the difficult challenges, duties, and responsibilities that come with being the Avatar.

The first several episodes set up the setting and introduces the main characters by spontaneous encounters. Mako and Bolin are two brothers who were orphans after their parents were murdered by a fire-bender. They crossed paths with Korra and the three of them became friends. Mako is also a fire-bender while his younger brother is an earth-bender. Soon enough, another character named Asami joins the group. Although she’s not a bender, she proves to be quite a valuable addition to the team regardless. And further complicates the dynamics between the teammates due to gender clash. They are occasionally accompanied by Tenzin, Aang’s son. Each season is called a book that each focuses on a different antagonist. Dictators and evil spirits and relationship issues,

oh my!

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What I like about this show:

It was interesting how this series protruded insight and a foundation from the original series while establishing its own uniqueness at the same time. Korra is nothing like Aang, the previous avatar. She’s female, to start things off… lol. She begins the series already knowing how to bend (bend=manipulate btw) fire, earth, and water while Aang began with only air. So the whole structure of the series differ just because of that alone. Korra isn’t traveling the world to learn new abilities but instead, focuses on more mature themes such as love, heartbreak, cordiality, sacrifice, spirituality, and faith in internal and external forces. I loved the more darker premise to the series compared to Aang’s story also.

What I hate about this show:

I wish the series would have lasted longer. Because each book had the minimum amount of shows a season could have, I felt like it could have easily lasted longer. Besides that, some of the characters were annoying or didn’t develop much throughout the series until right near the end. Although I just started watching book three, there’s nothing else bad I say… so far.

Overall score: 8.7/10

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Warmline Operator Bio

Before recovery, my life was…

hopeless, frustrating, and lonely. My family was very negative and constantly putting me down. Getting kicked out was a blessing in disguise.

My thoughts and feelings when I first started recovery were…

skeptical and pessimistic because people always told me that life will get better. I thought it was nonsense until I started believing in God and realizing that hardship is the only way to strengthen the soul.

What would you say is different about yourself now that you are in recovery, compared to how your life was before?

Positivity tends to come to me naturally now. I am a lot more self-aware and resilient as well. I have less people in my life these days, but at least I know now how to extract negative people from my social circle.

What are three ways that you maintain your recovery today?

a. Blogging

b. Physical Fitness

c. Keeping Busy (working out, attending college, going to church, etc.)

If you had the opportunity to tell another young person why they should seek recovery, what would you say?

Life is too short to be ashamed of your mental health problems. If you ignore them and leave them untreated, you will always be in misery. Life is not a video game either. You don’t have multiple lives. You only have one and it’s fragile and precious. We all have the ability to better ourselves and convert our trauma and hardship to our advantage.

Passing Time

Hello to my adventurous fallen angels! I have been suffering with writer’s block today. So I scavenged the world of WordPress until I came across a post about one of my favorite games of all time, Chrono Trigger. I hope you enjoy this re-blogged post like I did. Have a wonderful day! Over and out!

Problem Machine

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In 1995 when Chrono Trigger came out, I would have just turned 12. I stayed up through the Summer nights of Sacramento, playing until 5 in the morning on the cracked naugahyde couch in my dad’s living room. 20 years ago I became unstuck in time, and I’ve never really fit into place again since. I left some piece of myself in that game; it left some piece of itself in me. Same thing.

A week ago I watched someone play through Chrono Trigger as part of the Summer Games Done Quick charity speedrunning marathon, and it brought that little piece of myself back to me, and I still don’t quite know what to make of it. It’s still the most beautiful game I’ve played in so many ways, but so much time has passed since those Summer nights. I don’t really replay the game because I get bogged down…

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The Scarlet Harlot

Her dress sparkled scarlet underneath the fluorescence,
A mask of leather and lace as if directly from a burlesque house,
She forced herself to get out into the world instead of in slumber,
Awaiting the next beautiful lie to buy her a drink to get her in bed,
It wasn’t her first time at the rodeo but it was her second try at love,
Making love and fornication are two different kinds of pleasure,
She’s had more sexual encounters than she can recall,
But her heart only belonged to one man who was her ride or die,
Unfortunately the latter was proven to be true,
A debut appearance at the masquerade ball,
Sex and love are both addicting yet dangerous indulgences,
She mostly participated as if it’s a recreational means to kill time,
Even the most spontaneous and the most loveless acts of love,
Entwines two souls in a unique way that cannot allow a subtle rebuttal,
Not a virgin when she met him so impure when she met him,
Her soul cut into more and more yet smaller and smaller pieces,
Until peace itself is out of sight and out of mind,
So she stands scarlet clad at the open bar making small talk with the bartender,
Drowning her sorrow and eager at another attempt the fill the void,
She wanted the real true love but another one night stand will suffice,
At least that’s what she told herself,
Music played so debonair shielded from the nocturnal breeze,
Bodies sway to the melody while lyrics are suffocated in ecstasy,
Some escaped the crowd to achieve orgasm at their earliest convenience,
Others decided to stay and let the suspense build until the unveiling,
The woman wondered if the masks disguising their faces really mattered,
She knew who was male and who was female,
Names were nothing their pasts difficult to disect with conversation,
Accusations and assumptions were rarely correct with reason,
She wore her heart on her cheek but one kiss is not what man seek,
Never enough to satisfy permanently only a temporary fix,
Soon enough it was a minute before midnight,
Wasted time waned without bearing her soul on the dancefloor,
Waiting instead of taking action in fear of picking the wrong man,
But in doing nothing no experience is gained for once burned,
Big Ben began to rang a burdensome sound,
She watched as the men and women tore off their falsehood,
But she did not do the same for fear and anxiety rendered her from doing so,
For the law of allowance she loved to ignore within the folds of her dress

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Brotherhood Antiquity

When we were children,
The streets were dipped in a palette of bright colours,
Plastered with playground games,
Other neighborhood kids contributed to the Mona Lisa,
But until our friends faded away into the folds of our minds,
Our walls were down,
Sweetest submission to the latest fad,
Where the Jedi swung their lightsabers,
Where a young boy traveled the galaxy with Donald and Goofy,
It was here where the brotherhood was established,

Waking up to presents on the dining room table,
Three days of celebration for something we didn’t believe in,
When Nickelodeon and Disney actually had good shows,
A troupe of babies led by a one-year-old hero with his toy screwdriver,
A trio of high school kids where one of them was psychic,
Bunk beds in constant cleaning from nervous bladders,
It was here where the brotherhood was formed,

Saving up for bigger prizes and better gaming consoles,
When we should have saved ourselves,
An anomaly that can’t be revoked yet we are still close,
I do your homework in exchange for my own personal gain,
But it’s all in good fun indeed it is,
Four mile walks to the land of summer reading programs,
Escape from the coven of witches brewing sin in their cauldron,
Through it all an emperor and a father originated from antiquity,
It was here where the brotherhood was born and raised til present day

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Spread my ashes here

Where I met my first love,
Where I escaped from a broken home,
When my existence was sad and forlorn,
Where I knew my life was changed forever,
West Hartford Center,

Who I was before,
A scared and angry adolescent,
Who I am now,
A resilient and positive mister,
West Hartford Center,

Why did I ever leave,
Why did I have to move away,
Why did I have to grow up and pay bills,
Why does everything I touch wither,
West Hartford Center,

When I began to fathom love’s embrace,
When I experienced my first official heart break,
When I became one of those adults guarded from all emotion,
When life shoved it’s dick further,
West Hartford Center,

What do I do now in this crowded yet lonely world,
What new kind of beautiful lies will provoke my repressed desire,
What will be the title of the next chapter of my life,
What place can awaken the story that prevented anyone to enter,
West Hartford Center, 

How is someone like me pure of heart yet misfortunate,
How can bad things still happen to good people,
How will this place revive me when hope had just been born,
How can a man darken my state of mind as I placed him on an alter,
West Hartford Center

It was here where he came up to me,
Asked me if I’d rather stay with him or go home,
I can’t think of a better place to spread my ashes than here,
Just to do it all again and board the emotional roller coaster,
West Hartford Center

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Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂