Good evening to my hopeful fallen angels! It seems like even the best of us have our hard times. I was raised to judge people and to be close-minded. If you read any of my previous posts, you’ll know just how fucked up my childhood was because my mother raised me. I forgave her but there are still some things that seem to stick with me. She used to talk shit about homeless people or elderly people or even children. As a kid, I thought it was normal. I have been through so much since then. I now find myself going to soup kitchens whenever I run out of food stamps for the month. I look at the other people socializing in the basement of my church and I can’t ever imagine myself saying anything bad about them. The poor aren’t hopeless. They aren’t stupid. They are hopeful. They are resourceful. Some rich people are evil and some are loving. Same with the less wealthy. Financial status is not a corelation to how good a person is. My mother was the evil one. However I can’t let myself hate her. There’s this part of me so dark and apathetic that I can easily succumb to it. I doubt I’m alone when it comes to that regard. But fortunately, I’m still able to see the good in others no matter what. Yeah it’s beautiful but at the same time, that’s the reason I keep certain people in my life longer than I should. My compassion tends to have terrible repercussions. I believe the people who are truly struggling like me, the friendless, the pennyless, the lonely, are the most strongest people. We face unbelievable odds, got dealt horrible cards from the get-go, and hope still remains even though hardship never ceases to pile on. But it will cease. I honestly believe things will get better for me and people like me. Inner beauty will prevail against all odds in the end. My mother, my ex, and anyone who has done me and countless other people wrong will get what’s coming to them. That is the hope I have for my inevitable salvation and the faith I have in God. Being a Christian is all about coming to terms with the less fortunate to realize that life is hard. Perhaps the more hardship one can endure, the more bountiful the prize is at the end of the road. People may think I’m cold or heartless, but only while I’m blogging can I truly express my benevolent soul. It’s easier to be evil than it is to be good like it’s easier to make a mess than it is to clean it up. Whenever I’m nice to people, they take advantage of that. My mother used to say that when you offer someone a hand, they’ll take your whole arm. To be honest, I think a small part of my mother still lives within me. But overall, life is hard sometimes and there’s no need to judge people. No one had a right to classify anyone no matter what. So be yourself and don’t feel ashamed if you have to save cans and bottles for five cents each or go to a soup kitchen to get yourself through the rest of the month. If you are truly a beautiful person, then you have nothing to fear in the grand scheme of things. I love you all, my fallen angels! Have a wonderful day! Over and out.
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